Train Up a Child in the Way He Should Go

• Parent, Are You a Child of God? - The word “teach” in this highly significant verse Deu 11:9 “And ye shall teach them your children, speaking of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest down, and when thou risest up”, is directed to all true believers, especially those who are Christian parents. As we think about the enormous implications inherent in this verse, we must first recognize the importance of examining ourselves to determine if I, as a parent, have indeed become a child of God. This is a prerequisite in order to teach any child truth from the Bible. Psa 50:16 warns the unsaved “What hast thou to do to declare my statutes” and 2 Cor 13:5 warns each individual to “Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves. Know ye not your own selves, how that Jesus Christ is in you, except ye be reprobates?”, to meditate and walk in the Word of God. Another reason why this is so critical is because children learn more by the example set by the parent (or parents) than by any other means. Thus, as parents, we must beseech the Lord for His strength and grace in order to live out what we believe in front of our children; in other words, doctrine and daily living must go hand in hand. Jos 1:7-9 reveals God’s words to Moses’ successor, Joshua. In short, the essence of a Christian’s life is to be focused on and obedient to the Word of God. May God save you and work “in you that which is wellpleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ (Heb 13:21)”.

Psa 50:16-21 “But unto the wicked [unsaved] God saith, What hast thou to do to declare my statutes, or that thou shouldest take my covenant [or God’s law] in thy mouth? 17Seeing thou hatest instruction, and castest my words behind thee. 18When thou sawest a thief, then thou consentedst with him, and hast been partaker with adulterers. 19Thou givest thy mouth to evil, and thy tongue frameth deceit. 20Thou sittest and speakest against thy brother; thou slanderest thine own mother’s son. 21These things hast thou done, and I kept silence; thou thoughtest that I was altogether such an one as thyself: but I will reprove thee, and set them in order before thine eyes.”

Deu 11:18 “Therefore shall ye lay up these my words in your heart and in your soul, and bind them for a sign upon your hand, that they may be as frontlets between your eyes.”

Jos 1:7-9 “Only be thou strong and very courageous, that thou mayest observe to do according to all the law, which Moses my servant commanded thee: turn not from it to the right hand or to the left, that thou mayest prosper whithersoever thou goest. This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success. Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.”

• What to Teach your Child? - The word “teach” in Deu 11:19 “And ye shall teach them your children, speaking of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest down, and when thou risest up” also appears in Deu 6:6-9 (a parallel passage to Deu 11:18-20), “thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children”. In verse 6, “these words” refer to “the words of eternal life”, the Word of God, as we also see in John 6:68 “Then Simon Peter answered him, Lord, to whom shall we go? thou hast the words of eternal life”. In our day when apostasy abounds, we are under divine obligation to make sure the Gospel we are teaching is indeed that which is based upon all of the Bible and only the Bible! Ultimately, only God can teach or reveal truth to a person, regardless of their age “Shew me thy ways, O LORD; teach me thy paths. Lead me in thy truth, and teach me: for thou art the God of my salvation; on thee do I wait all the day” (Psa 25:4-5); yet the Christian parents (particularly the father in most cases) are responsible to witness the Gospel to their child (or children), as Eph 6:4 underscores, “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord”. We provoke our children to wrath by over-disciplining or under-disciplining them. The right-discipline is to “bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord”. Could it be that if God has redeemed us by His grace, we would be obedient to Eph 4:15, which states, “But speaking the truth in love, may grow up into him in all things, which is the head, even Christ:”

Deu 6:6-9 “And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: 7And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. 8And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. 9And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates.”

Isa 48:17 “Thus saith the LORD, thy Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel; I am the LORD thy God which teacheth thee to profit, which leadeth thee by the way that thou shouldest go.”

Psa 34:11 “Come, ye children, hearken unto me: I will teach you the fear of the LORD.”

• When to Start Teaching your Child? - 2 Tim 3:14-17 teaches a vital principle using Timothy, Paul’s young protégé, as an illustration, “But continue thou in the things which thou hast learned and hast been assured of, knowing of whom thou hast learned them; And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus. All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect [or complete], throughly furnished unto all good works”. Pro 22:6 also adds “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it”. Another example given to us in the Scriptures is that of Abraham in Gen 18:19, “For I know him [Abraham], that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him”. May God enable us by His grace to perform this solemn duty of training our children in the Word of God - the Bible.

Psa 78:1-8 “Give ear, O my people, to my law: incline your ears to the words of my mouth. 2I will open my mouth in a parable: I will utter dark sayings of old: 3Which we have heard and known, and our fathers have told us. 4We will not hide them from their children, shewing to the generation to come the praises of the LORD, and his strength, and his wonderful works that he hath done. 5For he established a testimony in Jacob, and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers, that they should make them known to their children: 6That the generation to come might know them, even the children which should be born; who should arise and declare them to their children: 7That they might set their hope in God, and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments: 8And might not be as their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation; a generation that set not their heart aright, and whose spirit was not stedfast with God.”

• When and Where to Teach your Child? - “When” and “where” this instruction is to take place. The word “when” is repeated four times in this passage: “And ye shall teach them your children, speaking of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest down, and when thou risest up” (Deu 11:19). Why so often?  Why so repetitive? Again and again and again, teach, teach, remind them, remind them “beware lest thou forget the LORD (Deu 6:12)”.  This verse pinpoints the fact that teaching our children to walk according to the Word of God is to be done routinely within the normal day-to-day activities as we interact with them, in every life situation, in every life decision. As we contemplate the verses in this lesson, may God give those of us who are parents His grace and strength to faithfully teach our children the truth of the Bible and to teach not only our own children, but to anyone else God might give us an opportunity to witness. Pro 1:8-9 admonishes children (also applies to every child of God) “My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother: For they shall be an ornament of grace unto thy head, and chains about thy neck.”

Deu 6:6-12 “And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: 7And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. 8And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes. 9And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates. 10And it shall be, when the Lord thy God shall have brought thee into the land which he sware unto thy fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give thee great and goodly cities, which thou buildedst not, 11 And houses full of all good things, which thou filledst not, and wells digged, which thou diggedst not, vineyards and olive trees, which thou plantedst not; when thou shalt have eaten and be full;

12 Then beware lest thou forget the Lord, which brought thee forth out of the land of Egypt (bondage of Satan), from the house of bondage.”

Pro 4:1-7 “Hear, ye children, the instruction of a father, and attend to know understanding. 2For I give you good doctrine, forsake ye not my law. 3For I was my father’s son, tender and only beloved in the sight of my mother. 4He taught me also, and said unto me, Let thine heart retain my words: keep my commandments, and live. 5Get wisdom, get understanding: forget it not; neither decline from the words of my mouth. 6Forsake her not, and she shall preserve thee: love her, and she shall keep thee. 7Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.”

Abba, Father in Heaven

• Our Father Which Art in Heaven - When Jesus prayed, He ad-dressed God as His Father. The Lord Jesus himself is spoken of as the “everlasting Father (Isa 9:6)”. Amazingly, God commands us to also address God as “Our Father” in the Lord's prayer. We do not fully under-stand such condescension on God's part but was made possible only through the sacrifice of His Son, Lord Jesus Christ. The Old Testament also has references to God as our Father. In the Bible, the fatherless is a reference to the spiritually destitute, the unsaved people. We are of God our Father through creation, but our sins have estranged us from God. In Adam we all fell and spiritually, the devil became our father. Only a true believer – that is, one in whom the Holy Spirit “dwells” – has been adopted into God’s eternal family as one of His children and has become a “joint heir” of heavenly glory with Christ. This happens at the moment we become “born again”. We are orphans when we are dead to sin, and God comes to us as a Father to the fatherless. God will be a Father to those who acknowledge their orphaned condition, their spiritual bankruptcy, with a broken and contrite heart. God cares for those who love Him.

John 8:42, 44 “42Jesus said unto them, If God were your Father, ye would love me: for I proceeded forth and came from God; neither came I of myself, but he sent me. 44Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do...”

Rom 9:7-8 “Neither, because they are the seed of Abraham, are they all children: but, In Isaac shall thy seed be called. 8That is, They which are the children of the flesh, these are not the children of God: but the children of the promise are counted for the seed.”

Eph 1:3-6 “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who hath blessed us with all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ: 4According as he hath chosen us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before him in love: 5Having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to himself, according to the good pleasure of his will, 6To the praise of the glory of his grace, wherein he hath made us accepted in the beloved.”

Gal 4:4-5 “...God sent forth his Son, made of a woman, made under the law, 5To redeem them that were under the law, that we might receive the adoption of sons. 6And because ye are sons, God hath sent forth the Spirit of his Son into your hearts, crying, Abba, Father. 7Wherefore thou art no more a servant, but a son; and if a son, then an heir of God through Christ.”

Rom 8:15-17 “For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father. The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God: And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together.”

1 John 3:1-2 “Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God: therefore the world knoweth us not, because it knew him not. 2Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is.”

Eph 2:8 “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:”

• Jehovahjireh, Lord, Our Heavenly Father Will Provide - Gen 22:1-14 describes the historical parable in which God commands Abraham to sacrifice his “only son” to God on Mount Moriah. When Isaac asked his father “where is the lamb for a burnt offering?”Abraham answered “God will provide himself a lamb”. Literally, verse 8 proclaims, “God will see to the lamb for Himself…”. God does not require Abraham to sacrifice his son, Isaac – and yet God willingly offered up His beloved Son – the Lord Jesus on the crosson Mount Moriah. Every time I read this passage I am dumbfounded by God’s mercy! God makes this amazing declaration in John 15:13, “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” While this is certainly true when taken at face value, yet when we grasp the spiritual ramifications of this sentence they indeed stagger our puny minds. What God is really enunciating is the fact that the Lord Jesus became sin – that is, the totality of each true Christian’s sins – and then He had to suffer the punishment of eternal damnation for those very sins. This fact is vividly highlighted in 2 Cor 5:21. Is it any wonder that Rom 8:32 asks this vital question, “He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?”, “all things that pertain unto life and godliness (2 Pet 1:3)”. The Bible speaks of the Father as the giver of every good and perfect gift (Jam 1:17). The greatest gift of all is the gift of salvation. He provides both Spiritual needs (Luke 11:13) and Worldly needs (Matt 6:32) of His children.

Gen 22:7-8,13-14 “And Isaac spake unto Abraham his father, and said, My father: and he said, Here am I, my son. And he said, Behold the fire and the wood: but where is the lamb for a burnt offering? 8And Abraham said, My son, God will provide himself a lamb for a burnt offering: so they went both of them together. 13And Abraham lifted up his eyes, and looked, and behold behind him a ram caught in a thicket by his horns: and Abraham went and took the ram, and offered him up for a burnt offering in the stead of his son. 14And Abraham called the name of that place Jehovahjireh: as it is said to this day, In the mount of the LORD it shall be seen.”

2 Cor 5:21 “For he [God the Father] hath made him [God the Son] to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of  God in him.”

Heb 10:12 “But this man [Lord Jesus Christ], after he had offered one sacrifice for sins for ever, sat down on the right hand of God;”

2 Pet 1:3-4 “According as his divine power hath given unto us all things that pertain unto life and godliness, through the knowledge of him that hath called us to glory and virtue: 4Whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.”

Luke 11:9-13 “And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. 10For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. 11If a son shall ask bread of any of you that is a father, will he give him a stone? or if he ask a fish, will he for a fish give him a serpent? 12Or if he shall ask an egg, will he offer him a scorpion? 13If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children: how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him?”

Matthew 6:25-33 “Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment? 26Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are ye not much better than they? 27Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his stature? 28And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin: 29And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith? 31Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? 32(For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. 33But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”

• What Son is He Whom the Father Chasteneth Not? As Many as I Love, I Rebuke - The “reproving” that the Scriptures provide is actually a demonstration of the Lord’s great, eternal love toward His redeemed people. Gods corrections and chastisements demonstrate His perfect, loving care and concern for each of His beloved children as He conforms them to the image of His dear Son. Rev 3:19 admonishes, “As many as I love, I rebuke [reprove] and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent”. John 15:2 also reveals God’s purpose in divine “pruning” in order to foster increased fruitfulness in the lives of His elect children. Job 5:17-18 adds to that idea. Similarly, in Heb 12:8 we learn that God “chastens” His children for their spiritual “profit”, and unlike an earthly father, our Heavenly Father never makes mistakes, and His discipline – though “grievous” – “yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness” as an end result.  Job 23:10 is a remarkable affirmation of God’s power and grace in the lives of His children: “But he knoweth the way that I take: when he hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold.” This wonderful promise highlights God’s constant faithfulness and love to His elect, and Jam 5:11, in turn, is a commentary on Job himself.

Pro 3:11-12 “My son, despise not the chastening of the LORD; neither be weary of his correction: For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.”

Heb 12:6-11 “For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 7If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? 8But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.9Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? 10For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness.11Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.”

John 15:2 “Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every branch that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit.”

Job 5:17-18 “Behold, happy is the man whom God correcteth: therefore despise not thou the chastening of the Almighty: For he maketh sore, and bindeth up: he woundeth, and his hands make whole.”

Jam 5:11 “Behold, we count them happy which endure. Ye have heard of the patience of Job, and have seen the end of the Lord; that the Lord is very pitiful, and of tender mercy.”

Qualities of Godly Fathers

• One That Ruleth Well his Own House - God commands fathers to teach, discipline, and rule their households. As early as Gen 18:19 we note God’s expectation for Abraham as the head of his family: “For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him”. A similar command was given in Deu 6:7: “thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children”. 1 Tim 3:5 postulates, how the Elders and Deacons in an institutional Church were to be selected to a high degree on the basis of how well they ruled their own households. This verse should still reflect the goals of all Christian fathers with respect to teaching and disciplining the children whom God has entrusted to their care. God’s words about rearing children in the Scriptures are not just “suggestions” – they are commandments that we must strive to obey. Let’s consider 1 Tim 3:4, “One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity”. To “rule” is to, “maintain”, or “be over”. God has assigned this vitally important task to all fathers. Naturally, if there is no father, these responsibilities are then incumbent on the mother. May God give us the grace to perform these most important biblical duties with faithfulness and kindness. 

Psa 127:3 “Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.”

1 Tim 3:12 “Let the deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well.”

1 Tim 3:5 “For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?”

Rom 12:8 “Or he that exhorteth, on exhortation: he that giveth, let him do it with simplicity; he that ruleth, with diligence; he that sheweth mercy, with cheerfulness.”

Gen 18:19 “For I know him [Abraham], that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.”

• Having his Children in Subjection with All Gravity - Now let's consider second part of 1 Tim 3:4, “One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity”. What does it mean to have one’s children “in subjection with all gravity” and to have “faithful children not accused of riot or unruly” found in Tit 1:6? Luke 2:51 is speaking of the Savior Himself, Who, as a boy, humbly submitted Himself to His earthly parents. What an outstanding example for all children and adults as well! Rom 13:1 announces a key principle for obeying all God-ordained authority. Fathers, we need to cultivate these characteristics of submission and obedience to the Bible in our own lives, as well as in the lives of our children. The word “riot” means “excess”, “out of control” and also rendered as “disobedient” and “not put under”, as in 1 Tim 1:9. The idea here is that the children are not to be “out of control” since “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child…”, according to Pro 22:15a. Riotous and unruly behavior must never be tolerated and must be corrected immediately, firmly, and consistently so the child will understand that he cannot get away with such unacceptable behavior. In Heb 12:8 we learn that God “chastens” His children for their spiritual “profit”, and unlike an earthly father, our Heavenly Father never makes mistakes, and His discipline – though “grievous” – “yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness” as an end result. Rev 3:19 admonishes, “As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent”. Eph 6:4 underscores, “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord”. We provoke our children to wrath by over-disciplining or under-disciplining them. The right-discipline is to “bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord”.

Tit 1:6 “If any be blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children not accused of riot or unruly.”

Luke 2:51 “And he [Jesus] went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject unto them [His parents]: but his mother kept all these sayings in her heart.”

Rom 13:1 “Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.”

Pro 3:11-12 “My son, despise not the chastening of the LORD; neither be weary of his correction: For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.”

Heb 12:6-11 “For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 7If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? 8But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons. 9Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? 10For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness. 11Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.”

• Having his Children Steadfast in God - Have you ever wondered why we don’t have to teach our children to be selfish, or mean, or rebellious? It is a part of their human nature – even as it is with every one of us. And that is precisely what Eph 2:1-3 teaches. We inherited this sinful nature from Adam. At the very onset we learn that God clearly established laws, or rules, that Adam was expected to obey (Gen 2:15-17) – and had the ability to do so. God also informed Adam that disobedience to his commands would result in death, spiritual death. This concept of God’s Law (which is the entire Bible) and the eternal consequences of violating His Law (eternal damnation) is of supreme importance to the human race. There are also other ways that we, as fathers, teach rules, and how the breaking of those rules results in specific consequences. As fathers, we have a divine obligation to teach our children the Gospel of Christ, which is the whole Bible and we need to be reminded of our solemn responsibility to train, correct, and discipline our children in love. One aspect of Tit 1:6 that I don’t want to overlook is the phrase, “... having faithful children…”. I cannot emphasize this enough; As fathers we can modify behavior, and it is part of our responsibility to ensure that there is an atmosphere of order and tranquility in our homes. However, that in itself will not produce salvation, or “faithful children”, only “the rod of correction” which is the “Word of God” can produce Faith unto Salvation since “So then faith [cometh] by hearing, and hearing by the word of God (Rom 10:17)”. God’s Word, the two-edge sword which has power to deliver ones soul from hell, is the source of all divine instruction, nurture, admonition, chastening and correction.This has to be the ultimate aim of all our prayers for our children, all our training, all our correction, all our discipline, and all our love. May it bear the fruit of 2 Tim 3:15, if God should allow: “And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus”.

Eph 2:1-3 “And you hath he quickened, who were dead in trespasses and sins; Wherein in time past ye walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience: Among whom also we all had our conversation [or lifestyle] in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others.”

2 Tim 3:16 “All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction [nurture] in righteousness:”

Pro 22:15 “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction [the Word of God] shall drive it far from him.”

Pro 29:15 “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.”

Pro 23:13 “Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod [the Word of God], he shall not die [eternally].”

Deu 6:7 “And thou shalt teach them [God’s commandments] diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.”

Psa 78:4-8 “We will not hide them from their children, shewing to the generation to come the praises of the LORD, and his strength, and his wonderful works that he hath done. For he established a testimony in Jacob, and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers, that they should make them known to their children: That the generation to come might know them, even the children which should be born; who should arise and declare them to their children: That they might set their hope in God, and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments: And might not be as their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation; a generation that set not their heart aright, and whose spirit was not stedfast with God.”

• One That Sets the Example - As parents we are also subject to the same authority as our children – God’s Word – and we need to clearly explain this fact to our children. Thus, parents and children are to walk humbly and obediently before the Word of God. Without a doubt, one of the most difficult arenas in which to be a witness is among our own family members. It is indeed a proving ground without parallel, and we face all kinds of tests daily. How are we going to react? Are we going to exhibit the fruit of the Spirit or the works of the flesh? The word “teach” in this highly significant verse Deu 11:9, is directed to all true believers, especially those who are Christian parents. As we think about the enormous implications inherent in this verse, we must first recognize the importance of examining ourselves to determine if I, as a parent, have indeed become a child of God. This is a prerequisite in order to teach any child truth from the Bible. Psa 50:16 warns the unsaved “What hast thou to do to declare my statutes” and 2 Cor 13:5 warns each individual to “Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith”, to meditate and walk in the Word of God. Another reason why this is so critical is because children learn more by the example set by the parent (or parents) than by any other means. Thus, as parents, we must beseech the Lord for His strength and grace in order to live out what we believe in front of our children; in other words, doctrine and daily living must go hand in hand. Thus, family life according to God’s Word becomes the forge, hammer, and anvil that shape our Christian living and growth. Without a doubt the greatest lesson our children will learn will be to follow not so much what we say, but rather what we do. This is the overwhelmingly profound influence of example. Consider the words of Jam 1:22-25 “But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves ...”. 2 Tim 1:5 highlights this heavenly truth as well. If any of our children becomes a true child of God, it is only by the mercy of God; but whatever happens we can rest in the knowledge that God does “all things well”, according to Mark 7:37. Psa 127:1 is a magnificent tribute to God’s constant faithfulness: “Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it ...”.

Jos 1:7-9 “Only be thou strong and very courageous, that thou mayest observe to do according to all the law, which Moses my servant commanded thee: turn not from it to the right hand or to the left, that thou mayest prosper whithersoever thou goest. This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success.”

Deu 11:19 “And ye shall teach them your children, speaking of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.”

Psa 50:16-17 “But unto the wicked [unsaved] God saith, What hast thou to do to declare my statutes, or that thou shouldest take my covenant [or God’s law] in thy mouth? 17Seeing thou hatest instruction, and castest my words behind thee.”

2 Cor 13:5 “Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves. Know ye not your own selves, how that Jesus Christ is in you, except ye be reprobates?”

Jam 1:22-25 “But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves. For if any be a hearer of the word, and not a doer, he is like unto a man beholding his natural face in a glass: For he beholdeth himself, and goeth his way, and straightway forgetteth what manner of man he was. But whoso looketh into the perfect law of liberty, and continueth therein, he being not a forgetful hearer, but a doer of the work, this man shall be blessed in his deed.”

2 Tim 1:5 “When I call to remembrance the unfeigned faith that is in thee, which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois, and thy mother Eunice; and I am persuaded that in thee also.”

Psa 127:1 “Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.”

Fathers, Raise Your Children in the Admonition of the Lord

• God Commands Fathers to Teach, Discipline, and Rule Their Households - As early as Gen 18:19 we note God’s expectation for Abraham as the head of his family: “For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him”. A similar command was given in Deu 6:7: “thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children”. God’s words about rearing children in the Scriptures are not just “suggestions” – they are commandments that we must strive to obey. God has assigned this vitally important task to fathers, as the following verses maintain. Naturally, if there is no father, these responsibilities are then incumbent on the mother. May God give us the grace to perform these most important biblical duties with faithfulness and kindness. May it bear the fruit of 2 Tim 3:15, if God should allow: “And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus”.

Gen 18:19 “For I know him [Abraham], that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.”

Deu 6:7 “And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.”

Isa 38:19 “The living, the living, he shall praise thee, as I do this day: the father to the children shall make known thy truth.”

Eph 6:4 “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”

• Instruction, Nurture, and Admonition only found in the “Word of God” - The Hebrew word for “Instruction” found in Pro 4:1 “Hear, ye children, the instruction [chastening, correction] of a father, and attend to know understanding”, is also found in Pro 3:11-12 where it is rendered as “chastening”: “My son, despise not the chastening [instruction, correction] of the LORD; neither be weary of his correction: For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth”. In Pro 23:13 this same word is translated as “correction”:  “Withhold not correction [chastening, instruction] from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod [the Word of God], he shall not die [eternal death]”. Eph 6:4 contains the word “nurture”: “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord”. Referring to the chief aim of the “Word of God”, the whole Bible, the same Greek word is rendered as “instruction” in 2 Tim 3:16 “All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction [nurture] in righteousness:”. And in Heb 12 we find the word used in four verses (5, 7, 8, and 11) as “chastening” or chastisement, and it is quite pertinent to our subject. Eph 6:4 also contains a Greek word rendered as “admonition”. Another citation where this word is used is in 1 Cor 10:11, “Now all these things happened unto them for ensamples: and they are written for our admonition, upon whom the ends of the world are come”. God’s Word, the two-edge sword which has power to deliver ones soul from hell, is the source of all divine instruction, nurture, admonition, chastening and correction.

Job 5:17 “Behold, happy is the man whom God correcteth: therefore despise not thou the chastening of the Almighty:”

Pro 13:24 “He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.”

Pro 6:23 “For the commandment is a lamp; and the law is light; and reproofs of instruction are the way of life [life everlasting]:”

Heb 12: 5, 7, 8, 11 “5And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not thouthe chastening [nurture] of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him”…“7If ye endure chastening [nurture], God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth [nurture] not ?”...“8But if ye be without chastisement [nurture], whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons”...“11Now no chastening [nurture] for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.”

• The Rod of Correction is the “Word of God” - Now, while it is true that corporal punishment has its place (particularly with smaller children who are unable to reason things out), there are a number of factors we need to keep in mind. First, the parent should never spank a child when he or she is angry. Secondly, there should always be a time for reconciliation and forgiveness when we explain to the child why we had to spank them and then re-affirm our love for them. However, ultimately, we want to expose the child to the spiritual “rod of correction”, which is the Bible. I will say this again, the goal of all child-rearing is to direct our children into the Word of God. Behavior modification can be instilled and is helpful for maintaining order and tranquility in the home, as I stated previously, but it will not produce salvation. This is why it is so vital to reason with our children from the Bible as soon as they are able to grasp basic principles. Another reason why this is so crucial, is that as parents we are also subject to the same authority as our children – God’s Word – and we need to clearly explain this fact to our children. Thus, parents and children are to walk humbly and obediently before the Word of God. Without a doubt, one of the most difficult arenas in which to be a witness is among our own family members. It is indeed a proving ground without parallel, and we face all kinds of tests daily. How are we going to react? Are we going to exhibit the fruit of the Spirit or the works of the flesh? Thus, family life according to God’s Word becomes the forge, hammer, and anvil that shape our Christian living and growth.

Pro 15:31-32 “The ear that heareth the reproof of life abideth among the wise [unsaved individuals are referred to as fools and saved individuals as wise, in the Bible]. 32He that refuseth instruction despiseth his own soul: but he that heareth reproof getteth understanding.”

Pro 22:15 “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.”

Pro 29:15 “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.”

Pro 23:12-14 “Apply thine heart unto instruction, and thine ears to the words of knowledge. 13Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. 14Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.”

Heb 4:12 “For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.”